What a week it’s been I’ve been in a constant state of fight or flight.
I’ve been in survival mode for so long that I’ve finally start to feel numb.
I’ve tried to keep away from social media this week just needed to have a quite word with myself.
Truth is I’m heartbroken on so many levels in my life to feel actual pain in my heart almost everyday this is combined situations from my past and my present situation.
Constantly feeling the need to defend myself and my actions to people they would never listen to what I have to say b it is pretty much hard work.
I always try to keep myself busy with the girls and with work
But this week I’ve not been able to block it all out aswell as I normally do
Mental health is so underfunded in the UK to many people mental health issues are misunderstood they say oh get over it pull yourself together it’s really not that easy.
Infact it’s bloody hard work to pretend you’re OK everyday when you aren’t.
Thing is with this blog I haven’t posted with intention of making people feel bad.
Infact it’s quite a different approach I’ve now taken in my life
I’ve been dwelling and I really could kick myself sometimes I’m a massive….
It’s a horrible feeling I can’t get rid off doesn’t matter how I try I just can’t move forwards and I’m not sure if I can or even if I want too.
I’m really trying my best trying to put plans in place for me to look forward im guessing somethings we can’t have or be apart of in life doesn’t matter how much we want to be apart of it.
I will be trying to relax this bank hols so I will give you a review of the bondi gradual tan when I’ve used it for the next few days.
Peace out thanks for reading…